Sunday, December 2, 2012

PART IX - A Retail Job? Life Isn't Fair (that's your Disclaimer)


     The newly-hired Merchandise Directors, Visual team, Marketing team, and Buyers at the corporate headquarters were all gay fashionistas.  At first, they seemed to get along with the old-timers in their departments.  I wanted to work at Corporate.  I wanted to work every day amongst the creativity of updating an iconic company!  
     For a few years, I got listed on the "Top 100 Salespeople"(out of thousands of sales associates).  I was full of great ideas, and the lessons of what to do and what NOT to do echoed in my mind, from my experiences and these books:







     Alas, my General Manager had a nasty habit of breaking promises that he made to his employees to get what he wanted from them.  I fell into his trap.  He had a long trail of talent that was lured to work with him, but quit within a year.  The desperate ones, who felt they had nowhere else to go in that era's poor economy (or because of their age), endured it longer.  
     Our GM wielded power at Corporate from his many years with the company and by currently working at the CEO's favorite store (the CEO lived nearby).  Our GM was selected for Corporate Committees, to appear in training videos, and to be on important conference calls.  His store was chosen for many high-profile events, and his ramblings were highly-regarded by clueless Corporate people.  He could "make or break" reputations.  He achieved extra power when the District Manager (who hired me), got promoted to Regional Manager.  My GM helped a weak-minded manager from the Outlet Stores to become District Manager, and that man remained indebted to my GM... doing whatever my GM asked: allocation, budgets, and ignoring the employee retention problems at our store.  



     After working for my GM for six years, I saw more and more people get hired and quit—some within months!  One saleswoman’s husband, the GM of the Benjamin Hotel in NYC, berated my GM as an "incompetent bully and not a true manager"… shortly after his wife walked off the job in tears.  (I applied for a job at the Benjamin, through that man, with no reply.  Twice.)  Incidentally, Mrs. Denihan, whose husband owned the Benjamin Hotel, was a client of mine… but she didn't help me with a job either.

     My 3-level flagship store had a unique "selling system".  There was a Downstairs team and an Upstairs team who were not supposed to cross-sell, unless asked to by their customer.  The Downstairs team (sportswear and shirts/ties) was supposed to send up any customer who wanted suits, sport coats, trousers or shoes and let the Upstairs team handle them.  Fairly, the Upstairs team wasn't supposed to go downstairs to "fish for customers".  In addition, there was a "rotation" on both levels of whichever salesman was "up" to help customers (like a baseball batting order).  However, Downstairs salespeople found loopholes.  Whenever customers entered the store for suits, those salesmen said, "Would you like to look at some shirts/ties first, and then I can bring you up there?"  If that didn't work, they suggested whatever "Sale" existed on their level, hoping to hook the customer so they could take the customer upstairs, afterwards, to buy suits.  Thus, the Upstairs team might starve, waiting for an unaccompanied customer to finally come up!  My new job was part of the Upstairs team.  Additionally, the Upstairs team had much higher sales goals than the Downstairs team.  The scenario was unfairly ridiculous!

     Other than me, nobody wanted to invest the time in Custom Clothing or Made-to-Measure.  I learned the "tricks of the trade" from Lea, the Tailor Shop & Custom Clothing Manager... before she quit.  Lea immigrated to the USA from Brazil.


     She became a mentor and friend (more than my GM ever did).  Lea hated our GM, who lured her to his store under false pretenses.  I loved the art of custom clothing: it was a relief from selling boring over-the-calf socks, baggy underwear, and pleated khakis to mindless old men, snooty kids, and drones of "Bridge & Tunnel" men.  (I felt like Countess Olenska in Age of Innocence: suffocating!)  
     I loved the mix-match of patterns, colors, fabric weights, the unique details of custom garments.  I worked with the corporate head of the MTM Department, and directly with the women in charge of the Garland Custom Shirt Factory in North Carolinawho all recognized my voice.  AND I was esteemed by the elderly owner/head tailor of a famous custom suit shoppe in Brooklyn, Martin Greenfield.  I was always enthusiastic to produce something new for clients: new fabric offerings, contrasting button threading and buttonhole stitching, custom-length ties for taller gentlemen, more colors of suit/overcoat linings, more Sea Island cotton, a better-designed ordering form, more user-friendly "online order entry system".  I even sat with the VP of Stores, during his visit, to illustrate, step-by-step, the shortcomings of the current computer ordering system... thus creating a streamlined system!  I became well-known in the company!


     Martin Greenfield (above), pulled me aside one day and told me that he admired me for my attitude and interest in the product/company.  I appreciated that, considering he had fit several of the last American Presidents, as well as made Michael Jackson's last/never-worn 3 concert outfits.  At one of our Trunk Shows, he watched me handle my clients and said, "You've really learned your stuff.  You're great.  All these other sales guys should be selling refrigerators."  (Sadly, our company's owner followed poor recommendations from his VP underlings and double-crossed that elderly man by breaking his agreement to work with Martin, and manufacturing suits in Thailand and in his own factory.  Martin never mentioned association with my company again).  







     During that time, I developed a love of English shoes.  In 1965, the company bought a shoemaker in England that earned a royal warrant from King George V, as well as the current Prince of Wales.  With an employee discount, I purchased two pairs of shoes from Peal & Company, which was founded in 1565.







     They lasted me for more than a decade, and I got many compliments from my clients.

     My sartorial talent was valued enough to allow me to be selected to give a "Dress to Impress" presentation at the elite Old Westbury Country Club...




... and then a Fashion Show—with models and some of the members.  I earned clients, but no friends or networking advances.  Their outdoor buffet was delicious, though!



     I created a morning coat for a old-monied Father of the Bride, and his picture appeared in the NYC Society Column.  Painter/equestrian Mrs. DuPont was my client, often coming into the store wearing her riding breeches.  An older woman who drove an annually-new Bentley—and a red SmartCar for weekends when the traffic was intense—poured money over her "scrumptiously cute" college-age grandsons: $700 blazers, $1,000 suits, and $600 cordovan loafers for each.  It was fun when they shucked out of different outfits; they didn't bother to use the dressing rooms.  Skiing, surfing, and summer-home sex apparently was good for their bodies!

     However, such clients always asked "qualifying questions" about my pedigree: where did I go to high school? (my answer impressed them), which university did graduate from? (my answer satisfied them), who did I know in their circle of friends? (usually not many), what brand of car did I drive? (my answer impressed them), what town did I live in? (that made them frown), why was I working in retail, and was that what I studied in college?  (My answers to the last 3 questions seemed to close doors).  I felt like saying, "If my alumni network or any of you would give me a chance with a good job, I'd amaze you."  Instead, they hired their buddies' kids from the same social circle.

     One day, an extremely tall fellow—whom nobody else wanted to help (because he didn't look well-dressed, and my coworkers assumed that he wouldn't fit into anything)—became a lifelong friend after I spent hours with him creating an outfit: custom suit, custom shirt, custom tie... which got him a job as Head of Security for Mercedes-sponsored events like Fashion Week and the US Open.  He was eternally grateful to me!  Consequently, he offered to sneak me past the velvet ropes into every Fashion Week in New York City!  LIFE LESSON: always help people.  


     NYC lacked proper facilities (no surprise), so the bi-annual Fashion Week events occurred in tents in Bryant Park.  My client invited me into the runway shows!  He snuck me into the VIP Lounges!  







He snuck me backstage!





     Fashion Weeks were fun, but none of my networking produced any lasting contacts.  Typical in "fashion", the people were flighty and unresponsive.  I met the Vice President of Public Relations for Mercedes: an utter self-absorbed snob.  He acted like Emperor Tiberius, expecting young men to suckle.  Being gracious, I accepted my client's continued invitations, as Fashion Week relocated to tents at Lincoln Center.  





     After awhile, the events merely seemed like overdone silliness/craziness.  I politely thanked my client but declined future ones.  It was okay; he got a new job in Florida during the next year.


     Constance Schwartz was the wife of one of my clients and the Director of the Nassau Community Museum.  She invited me to events like their Picasso exhibit, as well as private viewings and receptions.  I didn't meet any gay men, but I had fun.



Whilst there, I befriended the unbelievably effeminate (but married with kids) GM of the Salvatore Ferragamo boutique near mine.  He felt unable to help me with a job at his store because he feared my GM's wrath (also due to my GM's coziness with our shopping center's owner).  

    The owner of Macari Vineyards became my client, so I accepted his invitation to visit his winery on the North Fork of Long Island.  I got free tastings and free bottles.  He also suggested a cozy restaurant where I experienced the flavor of wild boar.  I returned twice with coworkers, and we explored five other wineries, including two on the South Fork.



     Another client spurred my interest in the polo games at Bethpage Park, not far from my home.  That was exciting.



     When John Kilcooley walked into my store, nobody wanted to help him because of his slouchy appearance and uncertainty of what he wanted.  I affably approached him.  He was a "makeover subject" on the popular TV show "Queer Eye For the Straight Guy" (none of my colleagues knew the show).



John was going to reappear for their anniversary episode!  Using my favorite color of lavender, great shoes, colorful socks, slim-tailoring, nifty cuff links, and pocket squares (I know a technique of folding 2 pocket squares together to create a 2-tone look!), he was ready!  On TV, the 5 Guys voted his outfit the 3rd Best Dressed—out of 100 men!  My company's Public Relations Department ignored my mention of it, as did my GM.  

     I was sad when Lea moved away, because it was one less positive-minded person in my life, during a downturn.  That's her, seen below.


     After she quit, an amazing job came to her!  Her boyfriend was a commercial airline pilot, and his friend was the private pilot for a Venezuelan oil tycoon.  Everything in her life was paid for—in addition to her salary.  She met celebrities and billionaires.  She toured big cities and faraway resorts around the world.  I loved seeing her pictures and postcards!  The tycoon kept his plane's staff in nice hotels.  He loaned his jet to Hollywood studios.  When she was "off duty", Lea lived in her boyfriend's Miami home, putting her salary into her own business of women's custom clothes.  Good for her!









     Many times, Lea invited me to Florida, but I had such financial troubles (I'll describe those soon) that I couldn't afford to go.  She was sorry for me.  

     The next Made-to-Measure Specialist lured by the GM was delighted with my curiosity and eagerness to learn from him.  Previously, Don O'Connor made clothes for millionaires like Alec Baldwin.  He got fed up with our GM's (and DM's) habit of wanting to falsify the sales figures and lie about the results to cover up their blundering mistakes and poor planning.  He got fed up with the broken promises, lack of organization, high expectations without support, cheapness, and unprofessionalism.  He quit, returned to his previous store, and offered me a job, which I politely declined (too small and too far out on Long Island: I wanted NYC). 

     The plump Englishwoman hired by our GM to be our store's phone operator and "store pager" quit because she received little respect from our GM and was being asked to multi-task too many additional things (without the pay).  I missed her presence, because she also worked on the second floor, and she had empathy for my struggles.  Her British buoyancy helped.


     A German tailor named Kris quit, followed by his Italian replacement (who stormed out—clutching his scissors, after experiencing our GM's broken promises).  Only the Greek tailor (who was due to retire soon) and the old Austrian tailor endured it.  The Austrian was a veteran of World War II!  His name was Gustav, but the Americans called him Gus, and he spoke with a thick accent.  Once, he showed me an old photo of him after being conscripted into the Nazi Army.  Detesting the job, he ran away and returned home... hiding in barns along the way.  When the Allied Forces liberated his country, he welcomed them.


Yet, even his patience "wore thin", and his outburst at our general manager resulted in him getting fired.  It was an unceremonious end for the 80-year-old war survivor.  

     Finally, an Italian tailor named Maria was lured with false promises from our company's Alterations Factory in Queens.  Maria liked my decency, passion for life, humbleness, and upstanding manners.  Out of our 38 coworkers, I was the only one whom she invited to her home, in Queens.



Her parents were born when Italy was ruled a monarchy.  She had a fondness for Old-World quality.  I sadly watched her get fed up with the way our store was being run—despite her sincere chats with our GM and his fake assurances.  I hugged her Goodbye on the day that she quit, too.  Unhappy with healthcare/living costs in the USA, she emigrated back to Italy, which has the best Universal Healthcare.




     My GM kept making promises to me (like so many other people in my life).  I continually impressed all kinds of people, as I applied for different jobs at Corporate: Made-to-Measure specialist, assistant to the MTM Director, salesman at the new SoHo boutique, assistant to the VP of Outlet Stores, assistant to the VP of Retail Stores, and a corporate Sales Trainer.  In each case, the hiring person was very impressed with my presentation, appearance, ideas, enthusiasm, success rate, sales figures, contributions to the company, and in-depth knowledge of the company.  Each time, my GM secretly squashed my advancementto keep me making money at his store... as other salesmen left his store in growing numbers.  
     So, I payed the bill for their freedom (just like I had done for my sister and father).  What a way to be thanked!  

     In my post-college job, I worked at a corporate headquarters, but it was the “field offices” that had all the fun: leaving early, office parties, relaxing environment, casual dress code, having folks at Corporate clean up their mistakes.  Working at the corporate office was a nightmare of supervision, reprimands, nasty gossip, and ladder-climbing.
     Now that I worked at the "store-level", it was the corporate employees who had a great life: free yoga classes, catered lunches, shorter summer hours, leaving at 3pm on Casual Fridays, office parties, free samples of clothes, Product Launch Parties, and complimentary massages on every other Tuesday—thanks to the billionaire CEO/owner.
     I felt like I was a character in the 1998 film "Dark City", where things kept getting changed around so that I couldn't advance!  


     My GM attended many of those fun things at Corporate—leaving mundane "store operations" to his 5 Assistant Managers and 3 key holders (an insane amount of staff for a store our size). 

     The billionaire owner appeared in company videos as he took his "yes men" Vice Presidents (the same who took away our job benefits) aboard his private jet to visit Supima Cotton farmers and to meet sheep herders in New Zealand.  Pictures of them on the CEO's yacht for "corporate retreats" reached us, while we watched our own jobs get more difficult.  As salesmen, we soon realized that their ploy was to keep increasing the sales targets and our goal percentages, so that we earned money for the company but not enough to earn our full commissions.
     All the hard-pressed profits that we earned for them were squandered on their half-brained schemes and "flash in the pan" ideas.  The revenue we made was squandered on their expensively-catered parties (I knew the caterer) to impress NY echelon.  The gay executives were eager to impress their gay friends with gorgeous (model) waiters...



...jazz orchestras, runway models, and party themes.  The CEO/owner blindly wrote checks to pay for all of it… and took it out of our paychecks.

     That did not stop me from presenting money-making and cost-saving ideas to the District Manager... and once to the Vice President of Retail Stores.  Alas, I was never rewarded.  When an overpaid executive had a money-making idea, they got a financial bonus.  When regular employees had ideas, they got nothing.  Thanks to my bright ideas, the company made more profits in each location, every month thereafter... but the company never thought I deserved a onetime payment as a bonus reward.  They didn't think lowly employees deserved it.

     I applied for Assistant Manager jobs at my store, as openings continued to appear (four AMs quit to escape our GM).  I soon realized that the GM liked minions as AMs.  He was lucky: he always had 5 Assistant Mangers (more than any flagship in the nation), so he never exerted himself!  Our store apparently didn't have the budget for an end-of-year party, but it had enough for 5 Assistant Managers on only 2 selling floors!
      One AM got her job because her husband was related to a Vice President of the shopping center, and my GM wanted a “political connection”.  She was clueless, prone to crying, and better as a perfume model.  Her husband's family owned the Ronzoni Pasta conglomerate.  

     The second AM relocated to NY from Ohio, seeking $$$.


She was nicknamed “bi-polar Dragon Lady”.  She "kissed the GM’s ass" so much that she agreed to drive 2 hours each way to operate the temporary “concept store” in the Hamptons.  (The Hamptons store was a disaster because Corporate idiots began construction without the correct permits.  Then, they made sure that lots of "props" arrived but didn't order enough merchandise, so they missed the first season, despite paying exorbitant rent!)  One day, the Dragon Lady inappropriately grabbed a salesman by the arm and fiercely dragged him downstairs to the Manager's Office for a reprimand.  Such manhandling was against Human Resources policy and was grounds for her to be disciplined.  Thanks to our GM, no consequences befell her, but the salesman was censured.  That man quit two weeks later, after trying unsuccessfully to file a formal complaint to our District Manager.  During that time, our GM worked with the snooty Director of Loss Prevention to create a false case of "commission fraud regarding product exchanges" against that salesman—to speed up his notion of quitting.  
     The third AM left the company for a NYC job at Thomas Pink, but he got scared of the enormous responsibility and quickly ran back.  He was only gone for 3 weeks.  Our GM took him back... but gave him all the worst tasks.  That AM was planning for a marriage and a baby, so he chose to obey.  The GM knew that.  
     The fourth AM was an Englishman named Andrew.  He possessed equity, morals, and manners. 


Previously, he worked for Her Majesty's Ambassador to the United States at the consulate in Manhattan.  He and I got along very well, and he continuously told me that I deserved a better work-environment.  He quit after also being unable to form a complaint against our GM with the DM.  (What's the purpose of a District Manager?)  He got hired at the Ralph Lauren Mansion on NYC's Madison Avenue.
     Another insult to me came in the making of the fifth AM, who was previously only a stock boy.  At 24-years-old, he lacked experience and maturity... but he was physically-fit and he was a brown-nosing "Yes Man".  Both things appealed to our GM.


Using typical lies, the GM tried to pacify me.  He called me into his office to explain that he was making that kid into an AM instead of me, because "I really shouldn’t want that low position" and "I was doing so much better on the sales floor"... and he would "take care of me" later.
 
     
When hiring new salesmen, my GM always told them that they could "earn as much as possible" (which was a lie, considering the lack of sizes, merchandise, talented tailors... and the heavy amount of steep discounting).  
     I got a $1 per-hour extra as Key Holder.  Laughable.  While the other 5 AMs were lounging in the Manager's Office, playing on their cellphones, I spent each evening closing the 9 cash registers, tallying the receipts, finishing up any adjustments, and bringing the cash drawers down to the vault in the basement.  That took time (off the sales floor) each night—often making me miss any last-minute rush of customers.  I couldn't do the duties after hours, because I wasn't "allowed to accrue overtime".

     When my GM began interviewing people for an AM job at a smaller mall store, I applied.  (Yes, it's odd that our DM allowed our GM to play a part in all of the Long Island hiring, allocation, and policy).  My gay GM succinctly hired a boy who previously only worked as a greeter at Abercrombie & Fitch... and who came to the interview in his flip flops and shirtless "job outfit" (as seen below).  No surprise that he got hired!



     My GM asked me to be our In-store Trainer for new procedures/programs... even though there were 5 idle Assistant Managers.  I trained our 14 salespeople—half were computer illiterate—and our 10 stock kids.  I trained them for the new online client books, computerized Point-of-Sale register programs, online Made-to-Measure ordering system, and computer codes for sales/price adjustments/returns.  Yet my efforts were not rewarded by the GM, as he didn't like folks to outshine him.  (It's almost as if he rewarded people for being idiots!)
     He was cheap.  For staff meetings, we were obliged to come—dressed for work—an hour earlier than usual.  Did he buy us breakfast?  No.  He considered anything beyond Dunkin' Doughnuts to be expensive.  During my first year, I used my former catering contacts to get us an affordable Holiday Party at a local restaurant.  My team was excited, since it was the first year that our company cancelled its End-of-Year party.  However, after that, the only Holiday Party we got was the pot-luck one that we made for ourselves... and ate in the basement's stock room before work on Christmas Eve.  Is that cheery?
     At a staff meeting, people questioned why he couldn't re-appropriate the money allotted for 3 huge floral bouquets that were delivered weekly?  I knew the muscular Haitian florist and found out that each bouquet cost $250… and our GM got constant free orchids for his home, as a result of the continued orders.  Lying to our faces, our GM huffed that the DM earmarked that money for flowers only, and it couldn't be changed. 
     Speaking of "kick-backs", I learned that all of our store's damaged merchandise was delivered to a Homeless Shelter.  Reliable sources told me that it never reached poor people because the employees at the Shelter stole merchandise for themselves, or to resell it!  Even worse, merchandise that our managers marked as "damaged" was donated... but was intended to be retrieved by them later! 
     With no oversight from upper management, all of that progressed.  

     One day, our GM arrived in a loaner car from the Mercedes dealership, while his car was being repaired.  He complained because they gave him a Cadillac DeVille, which he thought lacked true luxury.  He wanted another Mercedes… even though his car would be ready the next day.  Such priorities!?  He was a spoiled brat.

     If I displeased my GM, he might make me "open" the store repeatedly (especially after having me "close" the store, the night before).  Or he had me to do the bank deposits (pointedly timed during an afternoon "rush" of customers so I missed money-making opportunities).  Later, as I was desperate for more income and to advance my career (to actually use my college education), he began treating me poorly.  At that point, I was like a "pet that wasn't behaving", and he was going to punish me.  He repeatedly un-approved my "Day Off requests" and gave me the worst assignments during bi-annual inventories.  He detained me after work about petty minutia—just long enough for me to miss my bus (I gave up my car by then)… and I waited unsheltered outside for 40 minutes until the next bus came (in snow, rain, or humidity)!  
*[New York is infamous for lacking shelters by its bus stops.  Considering that many buses come 20 minutes apartif they come at allit's terrible treatment of taxpayers.  These were my experiences on NY public busesexcept there was not even a bench to sit on...





What does it resemble?  A third-world country.  


Perhaps NY assumes that poor people who use buses are from third-world countries, so they don't need anything more.  Certainly, it is because the USA is a car-focused culture that "punishes" people without cars].

     Due to the company giving him unsupervised power, the GM was cruel.  At staff meetings, he manipulated the emotions of his staff—and got joy from it.  He told them bad news—to see their reactions—but then promised something (dangle a "carrot") to get a rise out of them… and then smiled at them like the "Cheshire cat" playing with gerbils in wheels!  


He got a "power kick" from manipulating others.  Professionals said that he oughtn't be a "manager", but Fate let him.
     If I displeased him, he assigned me to the worst "complaint customers", who were bitter, persnickety, kept me late, involved lots of exchanges/returns, and took forever to make up their minds.  
     Anyone working in retail on the North Shore will testify that citizens of Great Neck, Lawrence, Woodmere, and King’s Point can be the most arrogant, cheap, nasty, caustic, demanding, rudely argumentative, and crude customers!  They’re bred to argue.  Their arrogance is displayed in the way they park their cars, as seen in this picture.



     They "cheat" stores, take advantage of courtesy, insist on discounts, and do things to harass/provoke Associates—so they can claim poor treatment to get more discounts.  Most people just buy a sweater.  Those people came to the store to chisel and scheme for discounts, find imaginary defects, argue about prices, and demand the "sale price" that expired months ago.  They are notorious for writing Customer Complain Letters, in order to get discounts or "compensation merchandise".  
     They realized that our Return Policy enslaved us to constantly give them new mens shirts.  They called their gimmick “the everlasting shirts”.  They bought shirts, wore them recklessly, then ripped or cut the elbows, and returned the filthy/overworn shirts—demanding new ones due to "manufacturer defects".  The company required us to give them new shirts!  No commission for our time, either.  Another scam was when they bought shirts on sale, then returned them individually, without any receipts, for full "store credit" on each one.  What a ridiculous Return Policy!  
     Next, the company made it mandatory for sales associates to open a certain number of credit cards per month... or get fired.  It was appalling, having to push credit cards applications (during that specific era in the 2008 collapsed economy) on customers who only wanted to buy clothes.  The interest rates were appalling, too.  Perhaps, a VP got a kick-back bribe from the credit card bank… and that's why it became "mandatory" (which was illegal and not in my Work Agreement or Employee Handbook).  
     A pathetic idea to lure credit card applications was the institution of a "reward card" program.  Cardholders got "store reward cards", depending on how much they bought.  One big problem, though: there was no oversight.  Scheming customers realized that they could buy a ton of merchandise, get the large-increment reward cards, use those reward cards to buy merchandise that they really wanted, then return all the previous stuff they'd bought (to initially get the reward cards).  It was disheartening to the sales associates, it wasted their time, and robbed them of commission.  Yet, the lack of corporate intelligence condoned the problem and allowed it to continue.  It was still going on when I resigned.  
     So was another idiotic idea from the owner’s wife to give away “Free shirt coupons”!  Local residents called her "a social climber".  She was a secretary in Queens before the CEO/owner married her.  Hence, our company distributed hundreds of Free shirt coupons at EVERY local charity event... a dozen times a year... all in our region!  Of course, we ran out of the kind of shirt that was offered in the coupons.  Upper management told us to GIVE AWAY other kinds of shirts!  95% of the people with those coupons only took the free shirt… and didn’t buy anything else.  We hated it and the fact that those transactions didn’t add any business—while wasting our time for no commission!  It also depleted our already-lacking size-run inventory of shirts: a "bread & butter" item for men's retail!  So stupid!

     A famous fashion editor from Chicago (and an Oprah Style guest), Stacy Wallace-Albert did an event at my store.  She told me, "I've never seen such obnoxious and difficult customers in my life."  I replied, "I'm still waiting for a medal from my company for dealing with these customers!"  She laughed.  I didn't.

     Dread increased when our company went to a "Draw versus Commission" pay structure; if you didn’t make your weekly sales goal, you only got paid your low hourly rate.  The company also began withholding commission payments for a whole month.  So, if you made your monthly goal, you didn't get your commission paid with the rest of your paycheck: you waited 4 weeks, until the following month!  Why have salespeople show up on time, make goal on time, but then NOT pay them on time?!
     That year, it was time to renew the employees’ Union contract, and the company made a “take it or leave it” offer of lowering everyone’s pay to $11.50-per-hour!  



It might’ve been a different story if our Union rejected it or made a strike—gaining publicity.  But, they meekly accepted the terms.  It was a sad reward for all the dollars taken from my years of paychecks to pay for the Union!  Then, I discovered that four of the fellows in my store (3 were our Union reps) were "grandfathered" into their $27 and $30-per-hour pay rates!  The rest of us felt betrayed.

     It made observing all of the owner’s parties—hosted at our store—so disgusting, as we watched him receive honors for charity work!  Meanwhile, our ONLY Christmas gift from him was a bread called panatone.  It was as if he said, “Let them eat cake.” (like below)!



     Every three months, the owner and his wife hosted expensive parties at our store.  It discouraged shoppers from entering, and it filled the store with canapé-munching freeloaders.  The caterer set up a kitchen in our stockroom, which made the new clothes smell like food!  Idiots!



Its gay proprietor hired a dozen male “food models” and bartenders.  Each model got paid more than me!  Tents went up outside the store.  Wynton Marsalis’ orchestra (from Jazz at Lincoln Center) played.  A Broadway theatre “backstage company” rigged the store with wiring, flat screen monitors, speakers, and a “control center” in the upstairs stock room.  




So much time and money was lavished on themselves… while the cheaply-made products hung nearby, being sold by underpaid/under-compensated/threatened staff.  All done so the owner could savor his time in the spotlight, proclaiming from the podium what a generous guy he was.  They featured cigar rollers, Scotch tastings, and viewings of the newest Jaguars (our company's owner showed off his blue Ferrari).  The Mets baseball mascot autographed T-shirts.  

     Relationships with long-standing suppliers/vendors disintegrated.  While the company publicly touted their longtime employees (to lure customers), they secretly wanted to rid themselves of the expense of longtime salaries.  I'm sure the temporary uptick in profits, after the loss of those employees, was squandered.  LIFE LESSON: It can be terrible to work as an employee, instead of your own boss.
     When the owner attended the 2008 Beijing Olympics, he and his wife thought it was a great idea to start selling expensive wooden bowls, lacquered with rare red Chinese tree sap.  Then, they loved the idea of having us sell French-milled soap.  Space boots.  Porcelain Christmas dishes.  None of it ever sold.  But the clothing merchandise that we kept asking for, which would've sold, wasn't produced.  Trade-offs.  The owner treated the company as a plaything… typical of non-earned billionaires.  
     In contrast, I learned how other business owners treated their employees.  A friend worked at restaurateur Danny Meyer’s “Shake Shack”.  Even though Shake Shack wasn’t as luxurious as Meyer's other establishments, Meyer took those employees on summer dinner cruises and gave them a huge Holiday party.  Meyer treated his Gramercy Tavern employees AND their "significant others" to dinner at an elite restaurant: Per Se.  Incidentally, our company's owner hired Meyer to speak at our national manager’s meeting.  Even though I couldn’t go, I read Meyer’s book.  I can’t imagine that any of his ideas about customer service, employee treatment, or hospitality were absorbed by our executives.  Read his book!  It's inspiring, true, and solid.



     The former AM who worked at the Ralph Lauren Mansion (below), told me that RL gave $100 bottles of Scotch to top-performing employees, along with a bonu$.  Salesmen behaved as if they worked at Buckingham Palace.





     I applied for a job there and impressed the HR director by knowing facts about the company—even that the quarter was coming to a close soon.  I exuded the look/manners/"touch of class" that they wanted.  He was impressed with my knowledge of the brand, speaking skills, and salesmanship, so he took me straightaway to a Vice President for an interview!  Alas, I didn’t get the job: the VP hired his friend, instead of me… which kept me in the hellhole where I was.  If you know Ralph Lauren corporate culture, you know that such a scenario is accurate.  They have a high turnover of staff, year after year, due to infighting and nepotism.  As I write this, www.glassdoor.com shows the following post about working there, "The hiring procedures at RL are sickening.  It's all about who you know and whose ass you kiss.  I watched coworkers work harder than anyone in their department, hoping to gain promotion, only to watch the spot be filled by the ridiculously unqualified receptionist who had friends in Corporate."

     When our VP of Stores visited our store, he didn't listen to the salesmen; he merely pointed out which light bulbs were out, which racks of clothes needed better spacing, and who had the highest sales.  The owner should've known that what a leader hears from middle-management is usually only praise and flattery.  Investigation is needed to verify the truth.  If it were me, I would ask the tailors, shippers, and salesmen; such information/feedback is priceless.

     With a poor compensation plan, you can only hire desperate people, so we got a bunch of losers!  The company still insisted on "ceremony" for customers, yet it advertised more Discount Days than Macy's!  The new salespeople were incompetent, aggressive, rude, and gauche.  




     New rules told salesmen that they could get fired for not writing a quota of Thank-you notes!  I watched the quality of the products decrease, pushing away my clients to other brands.  I watched the level of professionalism go down, as more uncaring and foul-mouthed workers came in.  Busy weekends at our shopping complex found Ferraris, BMWs, Bentleys, and Porsches in front of other stores like Gucci, St. John, Oscar De La Renta, and Carolina Herrera... but found battered Buicks, Grand Marquis, Caddilac Broughams (with Florida license plates, of course), and minivans clustered by our "sale-oriented" store.  It was just like the cheap customers who came to my restaurant for "early bird specials".  
     The company's cheap behavior—and continual hiring of cheap help—lured trashy thieves and shoplifters.  No, the company never spent money on Security—not even video cameras!  When a decrepit car full of a "people of a certain ethnicity" puttered into the parking lot, you could bet that they were coming to our store.



Even the "traffic ushers" in the parking lot laughed at us.
     We still got some upper-class clientele... buying ties for their kids' teachers (because the brand wasn't good enough anymore for themselves).  WASPs who didn't know about the downturned company only shopped there because their fathers and grandfathers shopped there.  



They were bewildered that such ruffians penetrated the North Shore shopping scene...




...but they demanded "upper crust" service nonetheless from the new salesmen (who matched the cheap customers).  It was loss for everyone—except the Corporate few who smiled at the temporary revenue.  

     I desired to work in an upscale environment yet found myself in a gutter of human refuse.  In my last two years, 13 people quit, and 3 got fired.  I saw the poor direction that the once-grand company was headed.  I decided to try and get the attention of the owner/CEO.  Feeling hopeful, I emailed him a letter, highlighting what mishaps I witnessed, what trends I observed, how the loyal customers felt, and how I wanted to contribute in greater ways.  My coworkers and some ex-coworkers admired it, saying it was the PERFECT sentiment, encompassing all the issues and presenting them succinctly.  
     What did I say?  
-Associates should get credit for free shirt coupons, since it takes the same amount of time/measurements/try-on fittings/ordering sizes as regular dress shirts.
-Ensure that stores aren't inundated with such coupons (considering the slowness of replenishment).
-The company's creation of monthly "discount sales" caused customers to regard the brand as cheap, which was not consistent with a company that offered custom clothing, a resort line, and a special designer line ($2,000 per suit).  The focus ought to be on quality & value.
-Have awareness for our marketing campaigns so that competitors don't alert the public (with their imitations) more effectively than we do (with the real thing).  Make sure that "editorial items" are plentiful in stock.
-Refine the "Return Policy" to prevent customers from getting full credit for shirts bought on sale (but returned without receipt).  They buy shirts ($150 each) when they're on sale "3 for $99", then return them individually for full $150 store credits.  Also prevent customers from getting never-ending dress shirts, just because they deliberately rip the fabric (after it's worn-out) and claim "manufacturer defect", so stores give them another shirt.  Why would paying customers want to keep paying?
-I was appalled that a corporate directive discontinued employee birthday cakes (to cut costs), while the Visual Dept overspends on unnecessary props for every single season (causing our store to pay for off-site storage).
-The "special collection" images—submitted by Corporate to our shopping center's publicized "look book"—are redundant.  It wastes that advertising space, which could otherwise highlight merchandise that is more relevant to our area.  Our store should select the images, since we understand our local target market.  
-Catalog and online purchase should have bar codes to facilitate in-store returns.
-Stores ought to know everything that they're going to get for each season.  In-store "look books", videos, and "inventory shipment emails" do not list everything.
-Catalogs shouldn't be distributed if a majority of its contents aren't readily available until a month or more later.  Online and phone customers see that merchandise is "sold out" (because it's not in Inventory yet) and they shop elsewhere.
-Custom clothing clients don't like being next to screaming children of bargain buyers.  Relocate the MTM section to the quiet rear of the second floor, where it was previously.
-Customers respond to the Feedback Request (on the bottom of their receipts) but are never acknowledged.  Similarly, employees send inquiries upward through management to Corporate but never hear back.  The company should acknowledge its stakeholders.  Remove the bottle-neck of information/communication.
-Clienteling systems should keep track of client's returns and exchanges in their buying history.
-Considering that our company owns its factories, our stores should have enough inventory of basic items.  We hear that our factories are unable to supply our customers because they're making garments for other brands.  It may alienate our core customers.
-Our store has a Regional Sales Manger, a Regional Visual Manager, and a Regional Merchandising Manager.  Store employees never have contact with them.  How are they going to assist, guide, and support us to make our goals?  Corporate entities should inquire with the sales force to determine customer reaction/feedback, what's selling/what's not, and what improvements or next-season-buying could be done.

     Had I been one of the people on the TV show "Undercover Boss", I probably would've been given $40,000 and a promotion by the CEO for that letter.
     However, the billionaire owner didn't have the decency to reply.  Instead, he bumped my "confidential" email back down to my GM and DM to "discuss it with me".  It got me nowhere and jeopardized my job!



     To cheer me up, a coworker listed words that described me: Art, Beauty, Communication, Adventure, Love, Joy, Excitement, Freedom, Integrity, Harmony, Writing, Discretion, Creativity, Nature, Success, Passion, Knowledge.  It all indicated that I didn't belong there.

     If you're wealthy and own your own company, then you have NO EXCUSE for running a shoddy business model.  Your organization shouldn't be rife with favoritism, bloated/flabby/ineffective middle management, or cheaply-compensated sales staff (facing the customer).  That's like looking the other way and allowing a swollen infection to fester.  It's akin to corruptly inefficient General Motors.  Instead, try the Fezziwig (a Dickens character) approach of "fair profit". 



     If you are working for such an organization—despite how plentiful they may seem—I encourage you to leave it and find an more appreciative job elsewhere.  They do exist.  (Robert Kiyosaki and his Rich Dad would be proud of me).  



*[In 2015, I dined with a friend who quit from working at the corporate offices of that company.  The same problems exist.  The owner squandered insane amounts of money on ridiculous things, and executives wasted resources lavishly on themselves: car services, gifts, meals, courier services, fashion shows.  "Key products" are made cheaply in Malaysia and mainland China, yet their prices soared.  The Chinese employees (supposedly not younger than 16) work 6-month shifts in factory "compounds"—that the company owns—before they return home to their villages.  In 2020, the 200-year-old American company declared bankruptcy.  The idiotic owner never saw his errors].
     A current employee's Glassdoor.com review said: "Borderline incompetent upper management, starting with the CEO (they recently fired roughly 40 district managers in one swoop and filled their positions with entry level managers who are quite clueless). Everything is extremely expensive and made in China or Malaysia.  The company fails when promotional sales arrive and they can't provide stores with adequate stock, then hound store staff for not achieving sales goals.  They have "charity" drives but don't care about charity; they merely know that its good for the company image.")   
     Some things never change: I'm glad that I'm outta there.

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